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At the research conference [Nov. 20th, 2009|08:29 am]





This journal must be the biggest crashing bore on LJ. Not only do I go to the same places time and time again, I post pictures of them almost identical to their predecessors. It’s the on-line equivalent of Groundhog Day, the movie.

Look back twelve months and you’ll see this very hotel, not perhaps the same room, although in most modern hotels they are identical, and a view that puts the vu in déjà vu. It’s the Hilton, where they put us up for the big HIV research conference this past week. And let me tell you, the Hilton is NICE; the beds are all slinky white sheets, down pillows and those heavy down comforters that mean I sleep and sleep and sleep.

I think I’ve mentioned before that HIV conferences and deluxe hotels don’t always mix, but this particular show is one that attracts a large number of researchers, doctors and such. who I suppose expect good accommodation. We people with HIV on scholarships, as I was, get the same treatment. There were 650 attendees in all this year.

This event, btw, is from the Ontario HIV Treatment Network (OHTN), a well-funded organization that I was once on the board of directors of - sat on the executive as its treasurer, in fact.



I was part of a panel talking about the evlauation of the HIV stigma campaign. My portion was, I think, originally scheduled for about 15 minutes, but at a late stage we had to share our 50-minute time slot with another dealing with syphilis stats., of all things, so I was cut down to 5-10 minutes. I made pretty good use of it though, and together our team did well, I thought. The outside evaluation of our campaign, was good, btw. I was particularly happy that the blogs fared well, generated substantial traffic to the website, including many repeat visitors. The quantitave measures also showed welcome shifts in attitudes towards HIV stigma in respondents who’d seen the campaign. Almost 2,000 were surveyed for the evaluation. Good stuff.



Elsewhere at the conference, there were many sessions dealing with the science of HIV, including treatment issues in particular, all of which, not being a fan of unintelligible gobbledegook, I avoided like the plague. But many others related to community-based research that it is readily understandable, dealing with social behaviours that lead to HIV, issues facing infected groups and so forth that I find quite fascinating. This year there was considerable emphasis too on the role of people living with HIV in actually conducting research rather than just being its subjects. Also clearly big right now is what the pros call “knowledge exchange”: how to disseminate research findings and turn them in to practice rather than see them fall with a dull thud on to an ever-growing pile of paper.

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The Great Big Montreal Post [Nov. 19th, 2009|03:25 pm]





Before I forget, Glee. What fun! I thought it would be mighty hard to follow the excellence of that episode the previous week that got everybody talking – and rightly so – but they sure turned in a brilliant show this week, again. This series has really hit its stride, hasn’t it?

Anyway, I’m back from our (sort of) freebie weekend in Montreal, and the subsequent research conference in Toronto. They were, of course, like chalk and cheese, but I’m glad to report I had a good time at both.

First of all, a comment on first-class train travel, which you recall we won. I’ve always travelled economy in the past. The upgrade was nice enough, but I wouldn’t say that the other presumably well-heeled paying customers got their money’s worth. First-class apparently costs about twice as much as economy, which means you’ll pay close to $500 for a Toronto/Montreal return ticket (yikes!) For that you get somewhat nicer, roomier seating (see above), a meal on a plastic tray reminiscent of airline food but with just a teensy bit more class – and what looked like a pretty unlimited supply of booze. As I’m no lush (honest!) that was wasted on me. Although I did like the truffles after the meal. Nice touch. More please!

As for the hotel, the big chains all seemed to have upgraded their rooms these days, so even our (free) accommodation at the Holiday Inn in midtown Montreal was extremely comfortable. It was also in a great location, so we were happy like clams. Here are the obligatory shots of the room and of the view from the window.





I’ve written here about Montreal many times here before – we tend to visit there about twice a year, usually with The Cloyce and Lorenzo who are also fans of the place - so presumably you know the basics by now. French-speaking with a European feel to it, sexy as all get out, good-looking people, lots of fashionistas on the streets, great food, good shopping. You somehow feel different here, very much a stranger in a strange land, but a welcome one.

When it rains in Montreal, as it did a lot while we were there, the city, I think looks sexier than ever, particularly at night. Very film noir in fact. I felt like I should be wearing a raincoat with the collar turned up, and a wide-brimmed hat.







More Montreal stuff? Clicky.

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Away again [Nov. 12th, 2009|09:55 pm]
To Montreal first thing tomorrow, with The Cloyce and Lorenzo. We’re going by train. The dogs are in kennels already; they love it there. I return Sunday, by-passing Nanookville completely and going direct to Toronto, where I’m at a research conference until Tuesday. I’ll be giving a presentation on the evaluation of the stigma campaign. Meirion and the others are staying in Montreal one day longer than I am, so they’ll be returning Monday.

We’re lucky. The Montreal trip was a prize that Meirion won for collecting the most money for our Local AIDS Walk in September. VIA Rail donated first class return train tickets and the two night’s hotel stay.

So I likely won’t be back on here until Wednesday. In the meantime, you'll behave, won't you?
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Glee. [Nov. 11th, 2009|10:01 pm]
Wow. Just wow!

I cant help thinking we've just seen something quite historic - and a HUGE advancement in disability rights issues. Not to mention very, very funny.
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The last of the landscaping [Nov. 11th, 2009|08:03 am]




We’ve been in the new house a year now, and have finished the last of the landscaping, for now. It’s been done in stages, in part because work like this is a bit hard on anyone’s budget. Last week, they completed the stone steps at the back, and made a flagstone walkway up by the back door along the side of the garage.

The downside of getting work done at this time of year is that the shirts stay on.

When we moved in, at the end of one of the wettest summers for years, we were faced with an erosion problem that had to be solved fast. We live on a fairly steep hillside, and the land at the back of the house in particular falls off sharply in to the woods. Not long after the hosue was built, our back yard started to disolve before our eyes. So we had landscaping done which both contained the erosion issue and tied to blend the semi-formality of the structure of the house with the woodland setting. Thanks to the landscaping combined with judicious plantings, everything is stable now.



That combination of practicality and aesthetics has been a challenge, though, and I’m not sure we've been 100% successful. We’re not landscape architects,but we’ve had a great landscaper, whose ideas have been good. We wanted all-natural materials – anything else just wouldn’t have fit in – and I’ve really liked his choice of stone, for the steps in particular. And the effect does produce a nice view from the big window in the living room, which was important to us. But I’m still not 100% sure it’s the ideal solution. I think I would have preferred something a little simpler. Nevertheless, I am pretty pleased with what’s been done.



We never really intended to have a garden here, just a house in the woods. But things sort of evolved. In any event, I’m happy that it’s uber-low maintenance. One of the issues that has marked my getting older is a dwindling interest in gardening. It's way harder than it used to be too, and I just don’t like doing it much anymore.

When we first moved to the country – that was thirteen years ago - I was very much in to gardening. We had a large and bountiful vegetable garden then, lots of flowers and perennial beds, including new ones that I put in, and seventeen acres that we kept somewhat manicured. It used to take over a day to cut the grass. I’m glad we’re over that.

Winston Churchill said “I like work. I can sit and watch it for hours.” I think I feel the same way about gardening. And gardeners.
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Two dog tales [Nov. 10th, 2009|07:57 am]




We had a bit of a scare with our Dougall on Sunday night. About bed-time he became very agitated and clearly wasn’t feeling well. Panting heavily, shivering and acting very clingy – that kind of thing. It only got worse over the next two hours, and he was just clinging to me in bed, obviously in some kind of distress. It's horrible when you don't know what’s bothering him. We phoned the vet at about 1.30 am – they're good at being on call for situations like this - and between us, we couldn't arrive at anything like a diagnosis. Anyway, he was starting to calm down by then, and after much cuddling and soothing talk, he eventually fell asleep. He was perfectly fine the next day.

Haven’t a clue what all that was about. Perhaps he ate something bad. Dudley, with whom he shares everything, was fine.

Do dogs ever have anxiety attacks? It looked a lot like that.

Talking of Dudley, he’s Meirion’s dog, but I love him equally, and I think he’s the more photogenic one. Here are three shots of him I’ve taken lately.





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The Great Big Pie Post [Nov. 9th, 2009|09:42 am]




So last Saturday was Nanookville's 30th annual perfect pie contest. And for the first time, I didn't just take pictures, I entered a pie.

Now before you get all excited, I didn’t win. This event is the hallowed ground of pie making; it's nationally famous, and mere mortals - particularly those like me who only learned to make pasty like five days ago – do not stand a lot of chance. These halls are, in other words, inhabited by serious pie-makers. At least for the most part. Did I mention I entered a pie?

Anyway, there’s some back-story to be told here. I had mentioned to our friend Norma, perhaps the reigning queen of piedom who has won the perfect pie contest THREE times and even has a car that boasts the licence plate MYPIE1, recently offered to show me how to make pastry. Now I’m not a total stranger to pie making - my key lime in particular has a reputation for being more than edible, but I’ve never been able to handle the pastry making part, so I’ve always bought those frozen pastry-shell things. But those are anathema to serious pie makers, and so with aspirations of pie sainthood, I consulted the best in the business.

Norma came over one evening to show Meirion and I how it was done. Together we made two apple pies from scratch, and I photographed the process and took detailed notes. (Neither of these pies were the one I entered, of course – that would have been cheating – but served as a trial run for my own effort. Those two pies, by the way, when we cooked them afterwards, were magnificent.)

Anyway, here are Meirion and Norma in our kitchen.







Anyway, while I wasn’t terribly confident that I had got it all down pat, and could in fact fly solo, I nevertheless resolved to throw my hat in the ring that Saturday. And rather than do apple, which is plain and simple but quite often wins the contest when done really, really well, I though I’d try an apple and cranberry. I cooked it Friday night; it looked like this. (The first picture shows the uncooked pie before the top crust went on – pretty, eh? The second shows after the crust had been put on.)





I froze the pie at that stage – apparently that produces best results later - with the aim of baking it early that next morning, the day of the contest. Which I did. And did. And did. Coming out of the oven, it looked overdone. The juice had started to run over just a bit and my previously somewhat attractive upper crust was not quite as attractive as it had promised in its uncooked state. So much so that I debated whether to enter it. But Merion encouraged me to – I had gone to all this trouble, after all - so I did.



Want to hear about how the contest went?. Clicky then

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Maskara II [Nov. 8th, 2009|08:39 am]
Our good friend Lorenzo has just posted some fab pics of Maskara II, the Halloween costume party we held in Nanookville last weekend. They are here.
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A call for accountability [Nov. 7th, 2009|05:47 pm]
More on the H1N1 vaccine rollout. We’ve been hearing that sports team and others with money and/or influence have jumped the queue on receiving H1N1 vaccine, despite not being in any category – caregivers, people with chronic conditions, etc. – that have been authorized to receive it. There have been calls for investigations and discipline of doctors administering vaccine to those non-priority recipients.

I personally was turned away at two clinics set up for high risk patients because they had no vaccine. It has clearly gone elsewhere.

I learned yesterday that H1N1 vaccine had been made available to the entire board of directors at the hospital which I deal with, the very hospital that turned me away on Wednesday because they did not have vaccine for HIV patients. This is in contravention of the policy guidelines issued by Ontario's Chief Medical Officer of Health. Hospital board of directors are NOT health-care workers. They are NOT entitled to priority. There has, fortunately, been an outcry in the press.

But I think those affected, and even those not, need to say enough is enough. This rollout has been – and continues to be – a disaster. For my part, I can no longer put up with this nonsense. So today I filed an official complaint with my hospital. Here is its text.

I am a patient of your Positive Care Clinic and have been for the last sixteen years. I have received extremely good service there to date, and I am extremely grateful to the team there for keeping me alive. These people care. But regretfully, I now wish to register a complaint - not with the clinic itself but with the conduct of your board and management team.

As a person living with HIV, my condition is specifically included in the list of conditions qualifying for first-line H1N1 vaccination. I just recently attended the Positive Care Clinic to get an H1N1 shot, as I had been informed such shots would be available there that week. (I previously had been turned away by my local Health unit-run clinic in Cobourg, as they had run out of vaccine, having apparently failed to prioritize attendees as required under the ministry guidelines.) I was hoping for better and more equitable treatment at St Mike's.

It turns out this wasn’t to be the case. When I attended your Positive Care Clinic on November 4 at 11am, I was told by the clerk at the front desk that the clinic had yet to receive ANY supplies of the H1N1 vaccine at all, and that I should check back again next week! I was astonished at this news, but eventually found another clinic that day in the Toronto downtown core which was vaccinating those eligible for first-tier treatment, and I got my shot.

I was therefore alarmed to hear yesterday in the national press that St Michael’s Hospital, despite having no vaccine available for its HIV+ patients, had made available H1N1 vaccine to its entire board of governors. As I’m sure you are aware, Ontario’s Chief Medical Officer of Health, Dr Arlene King, has ruled that hospital board members do NOT qualify as health care workers and thus in no way qualify for preferential treatment.

The Vice President of the Ontario Hospitals Association has called the decisions made by various hospitals to treat their board members as priority vaccine recipients “an honest mistake”. Mt. Sinai Hospital has apologised. Yet I see that a spokesperson for your board, in today’s edition of the Toronto Star, chose to justify St Mike’s decision to make available vaccine to their entire board, while priority patients went without. Some have called this a “serious ethical lapse and a grave error of judgement”. As a patient who was denied a vaccination at your hospital, I have to say I agree with the latter assessment.

I have been a board member – of the Canadian AIDS Society and of the Ontario HIV Treatment Network. I know what boards do. They do governance. They do NOT involve themselves in front line operations. They are NOT health care workers and unless they fall in to another high risk group, they certainly do NOT deserve special treatment. Your failure to acknowledge this, as others have done, is indeed both a serious ethical lapse and a grave error of judgement.

I believe you owe your patients both an explanation and an apology.

Could I have a response please, not from the Positive Care Clinic, who are blameless in all this, but from your hospital’s management team.

Thank you.
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Back from the big smoke [Nov. 6th, 2009|07:51 am]




I’ve said it before but I’ll say it again. I like Toronto, but it sure is nice to come back home. To Meirion, to the dogs and to the entirely different world that's little old Nanookville. I’m fortunate to have a foot in each.

If these hotel shots are familiar, it's because I’m a bit of a regular here. Nice room, passing view of downtown Toronto, rather run down corridors. Bargoon at $109 a night, corporate rate.



The meeting at the AIDS Bureau was good. Although I'm a fixture at many such meetings, I’m always a bit apprehensive, as I tend to be the only one in the room – I serve on a number of provincial committees - that isn’t an employee of an AIDS service organization or similar. But I suppose I bring a new perspective, and because I’ve been around the block so many times, I get the feeling my voice is respected, and I always feel like a fully contributing member. It’s nice that my volunteer work has led to this. Meaningful involvement, largely without pressure.



Things didn’t start so well on Wednesday morning, though. I had gone to Toronto early so that I could go to my HIV clinic, where I was sure they would have HIN1 vaccine. Wrong! I was dismayed to learn they hadn’t got any yet – further evidence that the rollout plan in Canada is fucked up. They offered that I should check back next week.

This being my second attempt to get vaccinated, I was – shall we say – perplexed. But I resisted exploding at the guy at the front desk and thought of ways how I could rescue the situation, and in particular, locate a real clinic with real vaccine There must be somewhere in downtown Toronto that was vaccinating high risk patients? So, in a flash of inspiration, I hightailed it to ACT (the AIDS Committee of Toronto) the venerable organization I started my volunteer career with many moons ago. Helpful as ever, they told me of a vacination clinic that day in Metro Hall that I could probably get in. It was the only one operating that day in downtown Toronto, a city of four million people. Gawd! Some rollout!

So I did. And I took pictures of the adventure, and how my day improved. Doing the clicky thing will get you there.

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Tiny trays [Nov. 4th, 2009|07:20 am]




I mentioned the other day that, out of curiosity, I had bought these weird little kids play-sets at a Japanese department stare. They come in a small box, the contents of which you don’t really know beforehand, as you are supposed to collect the set (something like the surprise element in those Kinder Egg thingies). Anyway, I was intrigued by those boxes advertizing airline food, so I forked out a few yen to see what was in a couple of them.

Turns out they are really interesting. You assemble all the pieces yourself; one of these shots includes a dollar coin, to give you an idea of the scale.

I loved the tiny plastic creamer in the shot above, even the coffee stirrer about the third the size of a matchstick.



In not unrelated news, and ever the curious soul, I stumbled across an interesting food website which is very much to my liking. It features hundreds of diptychs of people photographed with their breakfast. I guarantee you’ll love it. Here’s an example (the rest are here: http://jonhuck.com/breakfast/ )



Personally I’m relieved that I’m not the only one with healthy eating the last thing on their mind in the early hours. All of sudden, my habitual grilled cheese and coffee seems - well – a little more acceptable.

Anyway, I’m off to Toronto today, staying overnight for a meeting tomorrow. I’ll be trying to get my flu shot while I’m there. And a haircut. And a decent breakfast.
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Short clip [Nov. 3rd, 2009|12:38 pm]


Twenty-three seconds of a typical morning at Jeannine’s Backtalk Cafe. I often sit at the table at the back, but yesterday it was crowded and noisy so I sat with Meirion in the window seat. I had a grilled cheese and tomato sandwich, and a coffee. It’s one of my favourites.

We don’t talk much at breakfast. I usually read the Toronto Star. Lately it’s all about the H1N1 vaccine rollout. “A disgrace”, The Star calls it. We’re behaving “like a third world country”. The few clinics that are open, says The Star, “look like rush hour at a Mexican bus terminal.” They’re right of course.

British Columbia was out of the vaccine at the weekend, so was Alberta. And Ontario seems to be prescribing it like it was precious, with understaffed, under-supplied clinics, if they exist at all. At risk people, tagged first to get the vaccine, have been largely out of luck. My own municipality – Trent Hills – has not had one single clinic. The first is scheduled for this coming Friday. It’s in a neighbouring town. There is nothing in our own community. I imagine it will be swamped, just as every other clinic in the country has been swamped. Most people have been turned away,

My own experience has been horrible. With much difficulty, because you have to search hard to find details of where to get vaccinated, I ended up at Cobourg, in a neighbouring municipality, last Wednesday. The clinic was advertized on the Health Unit website as open from 1-6pm and was designated for high risk individuals only. Immune-compromised me falls squarely in to that category. When I got there at 3p.m. there was a long line up of families, screaming kids in tow (high risk? hmmm.) And a sign that said “clinic closed”. They had already run out of vaccine.

Turns out that the small amount of vaccine designated for high risk individuals had been given to every Tom, Dick and Harry that showed up. There was apparently an official reluctance to turn them away.

Things seem to be improving this week. But after months and months of forewarning, Health Canada, the provincial Ministry of Health & Long term Care and, particularly, the local Health Units, all somehow seemed to have failed people at risk miserably, not to mention the general population too, who will suffer similar frustrations shortly, I'm sure.

Surprisingly there has been little advocacy, protest or even help for groups particularly affected by all this. Nor has there been the kind of political storm that one would expect from this kind of bureaucratic fiasco. I guess the feeling is that those administering the rollout are doing the best they can with limited supplies, and perhaps that’s true. There are people in the midst of this, on the front lines, doing a sterling job, I’m sure. But upper level mistakes are glaring. Like procuring vaccine supplies from only one vendor. Like stimulating demand for the vaccine while a) not supplying it and b) not communicating with the public properly. Like dilly-dallying on electronic health records, which would have weeded out those not deemed high risk and placed them at the back of the queue rather than at the front.

So I’ve been frustrated. It’s not like I’m 100% sure this epidemic is as serious as its been made out to be – the sceptic in me thinks I may not even need the vaccine – but as my HIV docs have always drummed in to me the necessity for it, I’m going with the flow. Anyway, I’ll be in Toronto tomorrow and will take the opportunity to crash the HIV clinic there. Strikes me I’ll have a 99% chance of getting my shot then. If not, I feel like doing a Google search on “how to launch a class action suit.” Because surely we're heading in that direction, if thousands get sick needlessly?

I was in Jeannine's this morning too. The Star headline was "Flu-shot Overhaul in the Works." But some things you should really get right the first time, shouldn't you?
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Time to go small? [Nov. 2nd, 2009|07:29 am]




Must confess that, after a week of nothing but Halloween-related stuff, I’m so OVER it. I dunno, I used to like Halloween, getting dressed up and all, and throwing ourselves in to all things, even organizing a huge party called Maskara. This year, I could hardly wait for it to be over. I’m not so much jaded, as the whole thing has been one giant piece of work.

Having said that, Nanookville really got in to the spirit of things this year. The village’s first annual pumpkin carving festival, propelled by the community’s support for its founder, hurt in a car accident just days before the event, was a success. Wednesday night saw the town hall filled with folks happily carving pumpkins. Next day they were displayed outside our candle shop. Quite impressive they looked too.



Thursday there was a fun little ceremony announcing the winners. This could be the start of something big.



Friday was all about Maskara II. This is a fundraising event Meirion and I organize for Nanookville’s Main Street improvement project. It's a lot of work; we rent the town hall, a caterer and a live band and sell tickets at $35 a head. This year was bit of a hard sell, and the attendance was down, but we broke even (just) and everyone had a good time.

Neil from Stonehouse Gardens helped us with the decor. It had to be cheap enough to execute on a budget, but bold enough to transform a rather formal space in to something fun. We avoid anything too Halloween-ish (no bats, goblins or spiders here), instead choosing to play up the masquerade theme. This year we went circus-ish, with rolls of fabric strung overhead to form a sort of a canopy over the dance floor. . .



Meirion and I made the ten-foot pillars out of chicken wire. The shot below was taken after we had more or less finished decorating the hall. Later that night, lit up from within and with the hall lights turned down low, and with spotlights directed on the dance floor, the pillars et al looked pretty effective.



The band was excellent. So was the food. On the Side Catering served very elegant hors d’oeuvres that everyone loved.

I've also learned that YMCA - two years running - is THE ultimate track to get people on the dance floor.

Attendees included The Cloyce and Lorenzo and four of their friends, all in drag. As you can imagine, their arrival caused quite a stir, in fact the guys were the hit of the party. Anyway, we always have a costume contest, and while the winner was kind of obvious, we left it to the band to decide the five finalists, and the eventual winner, in order to avoid any conflict of interest issues. Here are the finalists. (Meirion is the mad hatter on the left, helping out; The Cloyce is the big haired lady in the middle.)



And the winner is . .

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And then there are the pups [Oct. 30th, 2009|09:09 am]




Fairy princess, Norse god – or something.

Don’t they look happy?
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I’m ready [Oct. 30th, 2009|07:12 am]




It started off as a pimp. Long fake leather coat with fake zebra trim, fake leather pants, hideous pink shirt and all. But somewhere along the way, with a few changes of accessories, it morphed in to aging rock star, a la Johnny Winter. Or maybe Edgar.

Anyway, I’m ready for our Halloween bash, Maskara II, and some rock and roll hoochie-koo. It happens at the Town Hall tonight.

Enjoy your Halloween.
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Jersey Boys [Oct. 29th, 2009|07:38 am]




There is a moment towards the mid-point of Jersey Boys, just before the intermission in fact, where the audience is bathed in light so bright, glaring and in your face that, if you are sitting near the front, you start to feel uncomfortable from the heat of the spotlights. For a few minutes there is the illusion you are standing behind the backs of the Four Seasons, on stage yourself, rather than watching the show from the auditorium. It’s a brilliant theatrical trick borrowed from Dreamgirls and it works even better here. Magic!

Why we hadn't seen this show earlier I’m not sure. Everybody we know who has seen it seems to be gaga over it. My gaga factor was about eight out of ten – I like more dramatic meat on the bones than there is here, and overall it seems a bit manipulative of its audience – but I’ll recommend it heartily nevertheless. The staging is slick as all get out, the music is of course great, performed with considerable gusto and with likable choreography, and everything builds to a satisfying climax. Audiences love a big fat ending, and this show has one.

I said there could have been more meat on the bones, book-wise. Having said that, the Frankie Valli story isn’t without interest. The group’s trials and tribulations, including the financial ones, are in fact quite a revelation. Who knew? OK, perhaps I’ll give it an 8.5.





On the way to Toronto, we stopped off at the Pacific Mall. This is the huge warren of little stores, the place I got my glasses at earler this year. It's a fascinating place, just full of Asian oddities. There’s a Japanese department store there which just had me scratching my head. I bought some little toys which intrigued me which I’m at a loss to describe – intricate miniatures of food items – that I'll post about later.

We ate at Axia, the place upstairs at the mall that we enjoyed on our previous visit. Meirion had some kind of Korean seafood stew, which surprised him with a fried egg on top. I'm not sure he liked it.





Altogether, though, it was a great day out.
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With apologies to John [Oct. 27th, 2009|07:39 am]




On the road to Campbellford, on the top of a hill that’s perhaps one of the highest points in our area, sits a pond. Right next to it is a quaint little farmhouse, with a view that stretches at least ten miles to the south, perhaps more. It’s an odd place for a pond – it must be spring-fed – which gives this spot almost a mythic feel to it. I pass it frequently, but I’ve never stopped there until yesterday, when the conditions – late afternoon light, nice cloud formations - seemed right.

A fellow photographer whose work I much admire has already photographed this place – very effectively I might add – so I’ve been reluctant to appear to infringe on his turf. But honestly, the location is irresistible, so I have.

In other news, we’re going to see The Jersey Boys in Toronto today. It’s another thing I’ve put off or years.
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Room with a view [Oct. 26th, 2009|07:41 am]




One of the drawbacks of photographing each hotel room I stay in is that, in Toronto, it’s quite often the same hotel. Sometimes even the same room. In this case, it’s the Ramada on Jarvis, which I happen to like, despite its not so classy address. Not that there’s anything wrong with the neighbourhood; I used to live not far from here for many years when I first came to Toronto.

It’s also cheap; the corporate rate, $119, is a bargoon in downtown Toronto. Mind you, the view is nothing to shout about.



It was a grey, cold and wet day in Toronto. Even the people on the street car looked grey as I made my way to the Queen and University area. One person was coughing, not something you can do on a streetcar nowadays without getting dirty looks. So I scowled in their general direction. I’m not exactly paranoid about germs, but I’m thinking this streetcar must be a breeding ground for H1N1 et al; all those poles people hold on to. So I wash my hands when I arrive at my destination and resolve to look up where the local flu vaccination clinics are. (I go Thursday, in Cobourg.)



The two meetings I had were at the AIDS Bureau on University Avenue, a branch of the provincial Ministry of Health & Long Term Care. For those new to my journal, I’m part of a committee that looks at gay men’s sexual health issues, and that influences the way HIV prevention campaigns are delivered in this province. My colleagues are smart – educators, researchers, policy wonks and a smattering of people living with HIV, like myself who have been around the block. I have to dance fast to keep up. But I (mostly) do.

I like this kind of work. It’s challenging and it’s meaningful. Importantly, it’s also free of the frustrations of board work that inevitably arise when not everyone is on the same page. Here we laugh, we make dirty jokes, but we get things done. The provincial HIV Stigma campaign came out of this group. Which incidentally, we heard an evalauation of. Seemed we did manage to change the attitudes of those who saw it.

We are also very strict; we have a written agenda, with times allocated to each topic, and we stick to it. The meeting is set to finish at 4pm, and thats’ exactly when it does. It’s not the best time for me as I have to fight the rush hour traffic to get home. More greyness, fading to black. Takes me about three hours before I’m back in Nanookville, a whole different world.



During our lunch break I had hurried through the drizzle to the Eaton Centre for lunch. On the way, I came across a patch of sidewalk lit up by fallen leaves – a patch of colour in an otherwise grey space.
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Bowl [Oct. 22nd, 2009|12:03 pm]




We bought this raku piece when we were up in Halliburton the week before last, on a studio tour.

When we had our walls painted last year in that weird mustard colour you’ve seen here, I read somewhere that the colour palette that would work with it consisted of what the article called "jewel colours”. Things like emerald, gold, ruby. They were right. While our colour scheme is pretty subdued, apart from the walls that nobody liked initially but now seem to, our accents are indeed mostly “jewel colours”.

There is often debate as to whether art should be picked that “goes with the furniture”. The argument is that doing so demeans the art, and relegates it to being just an accessory. But picking art of any kind that doesn’t fit your decor doesn’t seem right either. In fact it can make the art look bad, and that serves nobody well, right?
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Three barns [Oct. 20th, 2009|06:44 am]












Our local heritage society has a project underway to photographically document some of the barns in our area. It’s a disappearing part of our history. I’ve been helping them with that task, looking for interesting material, and shooting it.

Barns are also the subject of our local camera club’s challenge this month. You submit three photos and other members critique them. It’s sometimes painful, as the experience level of many members is a bit on the low side. As a result, I don’t get as much out of this process as I might. Still, I’ve sent in these three barn pics for tonight’s club meeting.

Earlier today I will be at Campbellford Palliative Care, speaking to their new volunteers, as I do every few months, about what I call the psycho-social impact of chronic illness. (High falutin' name for how being seriously ill feels, emotionally and practically.) I use HIV/AIDS is an example. When I started doing this for them many years ago, it was a fatal condition, so the emphasis has changed somewhat. But I still speak from first-hand experience, mixed in with the theory, and they still ask me back.

Tomorrow I’m off to Toronto for meetings. I return in the late afternoon, but leave the next day as I have a full day meeting in Toronto on Friday, starting early, which means I need to stay over in a hotel the night before. Yikes! So another busy kind of week where I won’t be around a lot here. Good thing is that all this business is manageable and - mostly - fun. Bad thing is I’m trying to shake off a half-hearted cold through all this.

Anyway, see you on the other side.
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Camera wonks [Oct. 19th, 2009|08:02 am]




To the Toronto Photography, Video & Digital Imaging Show yesterday, tagging Meirion along, which incidentally was a surprise as I thought he wouldn’t be interested. But we both enjoyed it.

Honestly, I don’t know how I kept my wallet in my pocket. So much stuff to covet here, but I ended up buying only a tripod, and a cheapo one at that. Still, I did try out a few lenses – I’m in the market for a new wide-angle - and one of the joys of these shows is you can try out lots of these, on your own camera, and compare the results.

So I chatted with the guy at the Nikon booth. I think I took the shot above on an 18-35mm zoom with VR, which the guy said went for around $1,100, but I can’t find it listed anywhere. It seemed to perform really well – very sharp and with not too much distortion around the edges, even when wide-open – and I wanted it, but I can probably get something similar for much less, particularly without VR. As for the uber-zoom phallic thing that Meirion is standing next to, I have performance anxiety just looking at, so I didn’t.

The show was held at the International Centre, which is a huge barn of a place right across from the airport. Driving out, we noticed a bunch of camera wonks gathered under the flight path. The planes come in very low overhead here, and there is often a gaggle of people there experiencing the rush and taking photos. It reminds me of the days when I was kid and we’d, go on family excursions to London Heathrow to see the planes take off and land. (Did I tell you I had a very boring childhood?)

Anyway, I joined the gaggle of camera wonks, pointed my camera skywards at the appropriate time, just as they all did, and clicked.



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Home again [Oct. 16th, 2009|12:37 pm]




It’s good to be home after seven days away, first on a short vacation up in Halliburton, and then three days at a conference for people living with HIV, and caregivers, in Muskoka. While it’s good to travel, it’s even better to return; I like my routine, and I like sleeping in a comfortable king-size bed with two smelly dogs and you know who. Even if collectively they all take up way too much room.

But the conference was good. There was a really nice feel to it – of people caring, sharing and supporting each other - which was as equally important as the informational components.

I was one of the co-presenters on the kick-off session, one talking about HIV stigma and how it’s being addressed. It started off kind of nerve-racking because we were dealing with a few technical issues right up to start time, and beyond. In particular, I needed internet access to show three or four websites related to HIV stigma, and while we finally got access, the connection was slow and we had buffering issues. Also, one of the presenters was extremely late – he got the time wrong in fact, and didn’t arrive until half way through, so I was scrambling throughout to cover his material. Whether folks noticed, I’m not sure, but certainly I did. Given these uncertainties, it’s hard to know how well we went down. Having said that, a presenter knows very easily when folks are paying attention (think you can sleep at the back of the room – or even the front - and not be noticed? Forget it!) At least the crowd seemed to be engaged. When the late presenter did arrive, he was extremely good, so he may have saved the day.

The workshop I gave on day two, called “Expressions of Identity” (which is way more touchy-feely than I usually get in to) went much better, I thought. Again there were technical glitches – I wanted to show my journal in conjunction with a bunch of my HIV related photos - but again, we had internet problems. Other than that, I think it was good. I’d selected thirty-something images which illustrated the choices that people with HIV have in defining themselves – either in passive roles like patient or victim or much more proactively, like as spokespersons or activists, for instance. Thematically it seemed to work, but I think folks also seemed to enjoy the uniqueness of the presentation. For me - and I said so - it felt just a tad self-indulgent, marrying as it did some of my own preoccupations - HIV, identity, photography – but that didn’t seem to matter. One person in the audience said she was inspired, and lots of others said nice things afterwards. Yay!

Some of the photos I used, btw appear in this set http://www.flickr.com/photos/22119868@N00/sets/72057594070110639/ supplemented by others I’ve taken elsewhere. To illustrate that we are all real and complete people, I also included photos of where I live, of Meirion and, of course, the dogs.

All in all, while the experience of both workshops was good, it did show me that multi-media presentations have their pitfalls, that they tend to involve more work and more stress, and that having a plan B is pretty important too. But that, like any other kind
of presentation where you put yourself out there, they can also be very rewarding – if not for the audience, at least for the presenter. Ha!
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Here, briefly [Oct. 12th, 2009|08:41 pm]




Three photos today from our trip up north. We arrived home this afternoon from a short vacation in the Halliburton Highlands. We had pretty awful weather up north – two out of the three days were cold and wet, including snow flurries this past Sunday. But we had a lovely time nevertheless. The resort had truly great food, plus of course it was great to spend time with our friends Mary and Carolyn, and also meet up with four other friends at their cottage for Thanksgiving dinner.

We played a lot of games too. Outburst, Catch Phrase, Skip Bo.

The fall colours were at their abolsute best this past weekend. Still, I think I may be done with photographing leaves. It’s been done to death and I’m convinced there is absolutely nothing new that you can do with the subject. So I mostly photographed other things. I’m happy, for instance, with the third one here, which seems to have a very un-Canadian “islands in the stream “feel to it, no?



Off early tomorrow for the long drive up to Gravenhurst, for a speaking gig amidst scenery not unlike that shown here. It’s going to be cool again. I reworked my two presentations I have to give there based on thoughts I had while I was away, because I couldn’t sleep on the not terribly comfortable beds. For one workshop, I’m going to be logging on to a website or two to illustrate what’s out there on the subject of HIV stigma. So I’m uncharacteristically apprehensive – worried a bit that teh internet gods will screw up. It’s why I often choose to be low–tech in my presentations; that and the fact that I'm starting to loathe PowerPoint. If I have a choice I just like to stand up and talk.



Anyway, a week away from home, sans dogs and half of it sans Meirion, is enough for me. I’ll be glad to get back in to my regular routine come Friday. In the meantime, maybe I'll take a few more photos of fall scenery and stuff. Leaves and all.
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Going up north [Oct. 8th, 2009|07:43 am]






Although this one was taken just round the corner from us, on the way from Nanookville to the neighbouring village of Roseneath, the scenery here isn’t unlike where I’ll be for the next week or so.

Tomorrow, we head up north, to the Halliburton Highlands, to spend Thanksgiving in a cottage by a lake with our friends Mary and Carolyn. This may sound very rustic, but it’s not; the cottage is attached to the inn we stayed at with my brother two years ago this week. It’s lovely, and the restaurant is first-class. It’s also very close – within walking distance - to Chris and Henry’s cottage, the place on Little Hawk Lake we’ve stayed at a couple of times. We will have turkey dinner with them on Sunday. Hopefully we won’t see the bears I photographed there earlier this summer. The girls are terrified at the prospect of having to walk to the cottage in the dark, but I hear this is not the season for seeing them, even at the dump.

Anyway, we get back Monday afternoon, then I leave early Tuesday for the retreat/conference for people with HIV at a resort north of Orillia. Similar terrain, a beautiful spot too, right on a lake, and the food is good there too. I have two presentations to give there, and I’m ready.

I mentioned the scenery up north is similar to that shown in the picture. But actually it’s not really close. What we call "up north" is actually a two- or three-hour drive away, where the Canadian Shield – a continent–wide slab of granite – comes to the surface, so the landscape’s full of rocky outcrops, vast lakes and miles and miles of virgin forest. The fall colours should be at their peak while we are up there, so expect a photo or two here.

But not for a while. Looking at my calendar, I see that the week after I get back is packed with stuff, and I'm not home a lot, so my appearances here on LJ will be sporadic at best for a while.

Anyway, have a great (Canadian) Thanksgiving folks – and be good while I’m away.
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Behold a Pale Horse [Oct. 7th, 2009|07:51 am]




One more behind the cut.

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Expanding my horizons [Oct. 5th, 2009|07:08 am]



Preserves being judged at the Roseneath Fair last week. Quilting judges are in the background.


Last Friday, while judging the Roseneath Fair photography competition, I spotted a lady I know over on the other side of the exhibit hall. She’s a judge of baked goods in many of the local fairs. I’ve often joked with her that I want a transfer from photography to baked goods, because – well, I have a sweet tooth. Half way through the morning, I made my pitch again; she sent me off with tiny samples of some date loaf she was judging at the time, and later sent me over some fudge which she said was too good to throw away, even though competition rules say she is supposed to. (Judges take only a small slice of each entry, observe, take a nibble and discard the rest of the sample. Rinse and repeat.)

Anyway, later she said that if I was serious, she’d put me down for judging school. It’s a one day thing, she said, and after that, the only requirement is that I follow the criteria in the handbook that the Ontario Association of Agricultural Shows requires judges to observe. She tried to point my future towards judging preserves, but as I explained I wasn’t overly keen on chowing down on dozens of jars not only of jams and jellies but also pickles and chutney and zucchini relish and a whole bunch of things I don’t even particularly like anyway – well, I'd rather not. Baked goods sounds much more fun.

As for the photography competition, the standard was the usual mix of good, indifferent and (lots of) god-awful. But once in a while, an entry really impresses, like the HDR effort below, which I happily awarded a first prize in the landscape category.





Judging is a paying gig - typically $40 or $50 a shot in these parts – so I’m not going to get rich on this. In the Homecraft Division - even the language is an anachronism - it’s a field populated largely by women of a certain age, and judging dozens of pies and other sweet stuff is apparently not as fun as it sounds. You get sugar overload fast, I’m told.

Still, I’m getting in training.

Hand me a donut!
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Diversion for a Friday night: Einstein, the amazing talking parrot. [Oct. 2nd, 2009|10:33 pm]


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Three Toronto doors [Oct. 2nd, 2009|08:00 am]










Yesterday I went to see Menopositive! The Musical at the Stirling Theatre. It’s the third time I’ve seen a show about menopause. That’s probably enough for now.

Three fun things I’m doing today: judging the Roseneath Fair photo contest, having dinner at Jeannine’s, going to the official opening of Mrs. McGarrigles (another gourmet food store) on Nanookville’s Main Street.

I don’t usually post on LJ on weekends, so see you in three days. Have a great weekend, folks!
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Church Street, Toronto [Oct. 1st, 2009|08:42 am]




To Toronto yesterday, for meetings. Later I wandered over to Church Street which is the centre of all things gay. I got my haircut there, as I always do. It’s cheap; fourteen bucks. I’ve tried other places closer to home but there have been too many local screw ups, i.e. new and inventive ways to spoil a simple haircut. Meirion gets his haircut in Toronto for similar reasons.

On Church Street itself, I can’t help noticing how many dogs are on that street now. Every second person seems to be walking one, or have one sitting at their side while they chat or have coffee. Given that this is almost entirely apartment territory, it doesn’t really seem an ideal area for a dog. On the other hand, most of them are of the lap dog variety, (furry little things otherwise known as drop-kick dogs) and presumably don’t need the level of exercise that our two biggish pups are used to. I’m sure samll dogs adapt to two or three littler outings a day. There are parks in the area too.

But the bigger dogs I see here occasionally? Nope. They need to run.

But for all these dogs, I just hope they aren’t being kept purely as fashion accessories. Or that if they are, that they match their owners’ outfits well.

Most do.



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Uggg times two . . [Sep. 29th, 2009|07:50 am]




I’ve gone for most of the summer without getting very involved in HIV work, but things are gearing up and I now have a slate of meetings and workshops ahead. I’m on no boards now, which saves me the frustration often inherent in these positions. But being a free agent, unaffiliated with any organization, distances me from the ebb and flow of the inner workings of the AIDS movement, which part I miss.

Still, I’m happy people still want me. Meanwhile, I get to pick and choose what I want to do. The balance seems about right.

Because they require some preparation, I’ve been working on two workshops I’m giving next month at a retreat for people living with HIV. The first one is on HIV stigma, which, since the campaign I was involved in earlier this year, has become sort of my calling card. I share that podium with two others knwlegerable in this field.

The second one is a workshop with the title “Expressions of Identity". It was originally suggested as a forum to talk about my HIV-related photography. Initially I wasn’t sure what tack to take until I realized that the pictures, which I’ve made a slideshow of, tell a story. That story is about how we poz folks define ourselves – as victims, as patients , as research subjects, or as advocates, as spokespeople, as volunteers, as controllers of our own destiny, as people just getting on with our lives. And it's all about how we record our personal stories too.

The above photo – I took it several years ago during one of my trips to the clinic – is one in this series. It’s of an activity that’s not something I relish looking at in real life (and I apologize if it makes anyone squeamish), but it’s always struck me as a powerful image that would resonate with anybody with HIV in particular. We’ll see.

In the other workshop, I’ll be showing some of the videos out there that address the subject of HIV stigma in both good and bad ways. Of course, I can’t resist showing what I think is one of the worst examples of stigma in recent times, the German “AIDS-is-A-Mass-Murderer” campaign video that’s been creating a stir in our community lately.

Some will be familiar with this video, but I’m sure others will be seeing it for the first time. It’s been banned on YouTube, not I think for its explicitness, but for the controversial nature of its message. I’d love to hear your take on it. It’s behind the cut, but be warned, it’s NSFW.

( Read more... )
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